Wait, what?
Yes, I want you to fail. Or more accurately, I want you to try something where you will probably fail.
In Angela Duckworth’s GritLab class at the University of Pennsylvania, students are assigned to try something that they are likely to fail.
I think this is a fantastic assignment. We need to experience what it’s like to stretch ourselves out of our comfort zones and learn that feeling uncomfortable and unsure is manageable.
Why is this important? Because if we never stretch ourselves, even against the odds, we won’t find our limits or discover what’s possible. Or just learn that something that seems scary could be fun, enjoyable, or rewarding. Anyone applying to Stanford or Harvard knows the acceptance rate is around 5%—but it’s 0% if you don’t apply. When running a race, I usually advise running conservatively for the first mile, but sometimes, in a race or practice, I want you to push harder and feel a bit scared, just to see if you can maintain it. We need to test ourselves to find our limits, or just to find out if we might enjoy or benefit from something that scares us a little.
When Professor Duckworth gives this assignment, her students often miss the mark—they try things that aren’t really different or threatening. For example, a student might say, “I went for a really long run,” but they already run regularly, so it’s just a bit longer. That’s not what Dr. Duckworth says she is looking for in the assignment. Trying a 12 miler when you usually run 10 is not the intent of the challenge. Or, “I invited friends to dinner, but they were busy, so I failed.” That’s not the point. The exercise should matter to us; we should care about the result and find it a bit intimidating (but not dangerous—I’m not suggesting you climb El Capitan).
To make the most of this challenge, we believe you should choose an activity that genuinely interests you and matters to you, the odds are against success, and it is not something you would typically do in a regular week.
I’d like you to try this exercise this week. Here are a couple of ideas, but feel free to choose your own adventure:
- Convince two non-runner friends to join our 7 a.m. summer runs. This goal is tough and a bit scary. Most friends might laugh and say “NO WAY!” But if you don’t ask, the chance is zero. Imagine the upside—if ten of you each convince two friends, we’ll have 30 runners! Yes, it’s unlikely, and we might fail, but we could succeed, and that would be amazing. Plus, you might help friends discover they can do something and that they enjoy something that they didn’t know they could do!*
- If you’re a non-swimmer, find a pool and try to swim 30 laps. This matters because you’re an endurance athlete. Swimming is endurance. Why not see if you can do this?**
Trying something like this can be scary, embarrassing, or threatening to our egos. But should it be? When you start AP Physics in August, your teacher won’t say, “Hey, Kirk, I heard you can’t swim thirty laps.” Harvard won’t reject you for not getting two friends to join your run. And if your friends refuse to run with you, they won’t think you’re any crazier than before—they already know you’re a cross-country athlete! These are risks worth taking, and part of what we are trying to learn is that failure is not as devastating as we might think. Failure can be part of the path to personal growth.
Why not try one or both of these ideas to challenge yourself in the next week or two? Or come up with your own personal challenge (for example, Anika and I came up with an idea that is personal and matters to her). I’d love to hear about your experience—email me at coachflatow@gmail.com and tell me what you did, what happened, and how you felt. I promise I won’t share without your permission.
I want you to learn to take chances like this in your life. I know that my life would not be the same if I had not decided to go back and get my first Masters’s degree at Chicago, if I had not tried to co-found a tech start-up, if I had not asked Mrs. Flatow out on a date, if I had not emailed Angela Duckworth to introduce myself, if I had not volunteered to coach at Monta Vista, if I had not applied for another Masters’ at UPenn 40 years after my first one. I hope all of you kids have that feeling of “what the heck, I’ll give it a try! What’s the worst that can happen?” now and then. Who knows where that will take you?
Let’s practice that together!
Week Five Suggested Runs
MVXC24 Athlete-Lead Summer Running
Week Five Suggestions: July 9
| Approx Miles | |||||
| Day | New | 35 | 45 | Suggested Run (you can change!) | Other |
| Mon | 5 | 5 | 7 | Let’s do hill repeats, like last week. Run out Byrne all the way to Stevens Creek Blvd, then turn left and left again to run the bike path through Blackberry Farm all the way to Linda Vista (this longer warm up is good for us!). Then let’s drill there and then 4 of the baby hill repeats to the stairs, and two full hill repeats to the top (picnic area)—I moved one short repeat to a long repeat, so we have a slight increase in workload this week. After that, new runners can head down Regnart to Bubb; varsity runners could run Rainbow to the RR tracks or Stelling. Hill repeats are a big step in the buildup to day one of the fall season! | Core, I’d love to see some extra lateral abs and shin splint prehab. Different people can suggest exercises! |
| Tues | 4
| 6 | 6 | Tempo Tuesday! Head out to Monta Vista Park and drill. Come back to school on the Palm Ave route through McClellan Ranch. New runners or runners getting back into shape can run this at conversational pace. Overachievers with big plans for the 2024 XC season can run the three miles at Steady State Pace* or even lactic threshold pace. Let’s get six strides on the track afterwards (you can run in-and-outs—that’s stride the straights, jog the curves—if you need an extra mile). | Core!!! The core I’d like to see? —side plank with elbow to knee touch, done right! Be stable… |
| Weds | 4 | 6 | 7 | Let’s run to Jollyman Park…for most of the new runners, for the warmup, let’s head out to the RR tracks to Rainbow, then Stelling to Jollyman. If you are varsity or tend to be one of the faster runners, then go out Stelling to Rainbow (this adds about ¼ mile so you are not standing and waiting too long at Jollyman; you can also run a lap around the track before heading out). To get back to school from Jollyman, run to Rainbow then Stelling; if you are one of the first runners back, run an extra lap or two rather than standing around waiting! | Core, and some extra shin-splint prehab—15m of heel walks B4 and after core and more if you want! |
| Thurs | 6 | 7 | 9 | Matadors Point run, runners that need more miles can run back using the golf course cutoff to Linda Vista Park and then to school. I would also like to challenge you to add 5 long repeat strides/light hill repeats…on the way back from Matadors, after you come down the steep hill from the dam, as you start back on the dirt road there is a gentle climb back up. Turn these into some long uphill, gentle strides. Recover back down and then repeat. These should feel good. Overachievers can also add on a mile on the way back to school by taking the golf course cut off to Linda Vista. You can also run Anika’s suggested add-on that goes partway out to REI then doubles back to get another hill. If you get back to school before everyone is back, how about running a few extra laps, striding the straightaways and jogging the curves? | Core…and let’s focus on legs (runner’s touch, reverse lunges, squats, mule kicks…) |
| Fri | 3 | 4 | 4 | Warm up on the track, drill, then you can get the easy mileage you need on the school grounds or nearby…Phar Lap, maybe. Strides are optional but a nice idea today! | Core. |
| Sat | 6 | 9 | 12 | Long run day…Up and Over, or Up and Over + Seven Springs (we don’t run Seven Springs enough…if you want a little more run Seven clockwise (that’s Julia’s Way, it’s a little longer and the views are super)). There might be runners that are still new and not quite ready for Up and Over, so it is OK turn around at Prospect and come back to school—but if anyone is up for the first time running up and over, help guide and support them! I like coming back from Up and Over by following Regnart to Bubb to McClellan, picking it up and stretching out my stride or even doing strides on that nice downhill. | Strides after or on the way back, and let’s do some extra calf stretch.
|
| Sun | Would be great to do something active! Bike ride together, get together and water run, swim, go to the beach, or the shoe store, then go have pizza…plan some fun and active things! | ||||
| Total | 28 | 35 | 46 | ||
*If you accept this challenge, really try! Bribe your friends, tell them about the summer running shirts, bring a fruit salad for after the run, buy them a donut, and really try to get them to join one or more of our runs! Do more than say “Wanna come on a run?” Work it! You probably will fail…but maybe not.
**This swimming “failure” exercise has special meaning for me. About 12 years ago, I jumped in the pool and tried to swim for cross-training. I thrashed four or five laps and was exhausted and felt like I accomplished nothing. I thought about this failure for a while. Instead of giving up, I found a private swim coach from the De Anza swim club, and when I was 50 years old, I took swimming lessons. Six months later, I ran a 12-minute marathon personal record! I never would have done all that if I had been too concerned about looking ridiculous when I jumped in the pool and tried to swim laps without knowing what I was doing.
P.S. Thank you to Angela Duckworth for her work and thoughts about failure and growth, and thank you to Anika for feedback as I brainstormed this post.
